It all started with yellow eyes.

In the fall of 2013, then Baldwin Wallace University freshman lacrosse student-athlete Jake Totten (Richfield/Revere) was sitting with some friends in his dorm when one friend told him that his eyes looked yellow. After confirming that they were indeed yellow, the group started to look on-line to see what could possibly be wrong.

Some of the results from their on-line search included mononucleosis and pancreatic cancer.

"All these cancers and hepatitis and AIDS [came up], and I'm like, great, all this," said Totten, who will join the Yellow Jacket men (12-2) in Westerville this evening when BW plays at Otterbein University in an Ohio Athletic Conference Tournament semifinal game at 7 p.m.

Fatigued and "out of it," Totten decided to go to the BW Health Center where they took multiple tests. The tests showed that Totten's white blood cell count was extremely low. Also, he had jaundice, which was why his eyes were yellow.

The doctor told Totten to go home and relax for a couple of days, but, even after doing that, he failed to feel any better.

"I was just a vampire. I was completely white, and, even the warm-up lap [for lacrosse], which is, what, a 50 yard jog, [made me] dead after," Totten said.

This began the whole process that would lead him to scheduling an appointment with an oncologist at University Hospitals Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital. A week after his appointment, Totten finally received an answer about what was wrong with him. He had cancer.

Totten was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia, a cancer of the bone marrow.

"It attacks my white blood cells and makes white blood cells that don't work and don't fight off infections," Totten said.

 

Totten, who only was about a week into his freshman year, had to drop out of BW. Besides having to stop school, Totten could not play lacrosse that season. He had only attended one practice in the fall offseason before he received his diagnosis.

Having leukemia not only affected Totten, but it also affected his family as well. Totten is extremely close to his younger brother Mack, who is a senior at Revere High School in Richfield. Mack explained how the news of his cancer hit home—literally.

 

"When Jake was diagnosed with leukemia, my whole family was caught off guard. After earlier adversity in our life, we didn't expect something like that to happen, but I guess that's just destiny. We had to deal with the cards given to us and drive on. Of course we were scared for him, but we kept our heads high," Mack said.

And Mack did keep his head high, helping his brother out by selling different colored bandanas for different cancers. He did this to support families across the country that are affected by cancer. His main motivation was his brother.

"We raised $10,000 for a great cause. I like to think all of that gave my brother hope as well. I loved seeing everyone wear the bandanas. It showed my brother, as well as my family, that we had others by our side," Mack said.

Totten's treatment included chemotherapy every Monday for about six to eight hours per visit. He received spinal taps, bone marrow biopsies, IVs and shots. He even had a tube inserted into his heart to allow the chemo could be pumped directly into and throughout his body. He also took close to 30 pills per day.

Today, Totten is in the maintenance phase of chemotherapy, which is the last stage of chemo and lasts for two years. In this stage, he gets treated once a month.

"Other than that, I'm good. I'm in remission. I was actually in remission technically after the first two months of chemo. It was good. They caught it early enough," Totten said.

Returning to school this past fall, Totten is a true freshman again. Currently in-season for the BW men's lacrosse team, the main concern for Totten has been his physical ability—all of the treatment has taken its toll on Totten.

Totten, who weighed 240 pounds his senior year of high school, dropped down to about 170 pounds during his treatment. He also lost all of his strength and foot speed, which is something he wants to work on for next season.

"I got really, really out of shape. I wasn't doing anything. All I would do was watch Netflix and just try to eat food for the most part," Totten said.

Totten believes he can return to his full potential for his sophomore season. He will have the chance to work out this upcoming year without being treated with hard chemo. Looking ahead, Totten has set a goal for himself that he knows he will accomplish.

"I want to be able to start eventually. It may not be next year or the year after, but I'm going to start one year. That's my ultimate goal," Totten said.

Mack wholeheartedly agrees with his brother.

"My brother will be a starter at some point. It's just hard when he's pumped full of that chemo all the time. When he is able to play to his full potential, his teammates will be happy they are on his team," Mack said.

Speaking of his team, that is the one aspect that Totten missed the most last year as he was going through his treatment. Totten, who played three sports growing up, is used to being a part of a team and being physically active.

"Not being a part of a team, it was so weird. It was just not who I am," Totten said.

Unfortunately, since Totten got sick a week into his first semester, he did not know many members of his team. However, Totten noted that head coach Jason Tarnow and assistant coach Jeff Fedor would text him while he was in the hospital, asking how Totten was doing. Tarnow also visited Totten a few times in the hospital.

Tarnow believes that Totten has a bright future in lacrosse ahead of him. He noted that Totten was one of the team's top defensive recruits his senior year. After getting his full strength and endurance back, Tarnow said Totten will contend to be a starter.

Totten plays defense, occasionally taking the face-off as well. His team set a school record with 11 straight wins top open the season. Totten detailed what goals he has for his team this season and for the rest of his athletic career at BW.

"As a team, I want to win an OAC championship and make it to the national tournament. That is one of our big goals. We're a really young team, so I think us sticking together [is really helpful] . . . There's no cliques on our team [and] there's no drama. Everyone's cool with each other," Totten said.

In regards to lacrosse, Totten looks at it differently than he did before he had cancer.

"I take [lacrosse] seriously, but, at the same time, I'm not going to take life so seriously now. You don't know what's going to happen to people," Totten said.

Tarnow commented on Totten's resolve to return to the field after going through what he did.

"I think seeing Jake beat cancer and come back to lacrosse is one of the greatest things I've seen in my coaching career. He is a hard-nosed kid, and he never seemed to doubt himself on the belief that he would beat cancer and come back to BW. For those who know Jake, him beating cancer is no surprise," Tarnow said.

From when he first was diagnosed until today, Totten has changed the way he goes about his life. He understands that anything can change when one least expects it.

"You have to take every day one step at a time. You never know what's around the next corner really. You just got to appreciate the little things in life. Have fun with life and just know the very next day could be something different. You just don't know what's going to happen. You just got to have fun with everything you do and chase your dreams," Totten said.

Mack, who refers to Totten as his best friend, highly regards his older brother.

"He is strong, disciplined and a softy when it comes down to it, even though it doesn't show. My brother is a fighter, and he will never quit anything," Mack said.

But the best way Mack could describe Totten's strength and bravery through his adversity with cancer is with this:

"My dad asked him one day, 'Why you?' And my brother responded with, 'Why not me?'"

The winner of today's OAC semi-final will play the winner of the John Carroll University versus Capital University game in the OAC Championship Game on Saturday, May 2. The winner of that game receives the OAC's automatic berth in the 2015 NCAA Division III National Tournament.